Where... oh where has my sanity gone....

Tell me why five plays are due tonight? Tell me why they have to be longer than ten pages? And tell me why grown men have to argue? I know the answers to all these questions, but dammit I have the right to complain about it. Michael 18 page play?!?! C'mon... that's eight pages OVER the limit!!! And why does the stapler have to roam??? And not just any stapler a shytty stapler! Please bring this semester to a close... NOW!